If Nothing Changes, Nothing Changes:
Hope For Change In The New Year
Meet Donna. She’s contemplating what’s been going on this year regarding New Year goals and she doesn’t really feel like she has accomplished much. In fact, she says she has been stuck for a long time now, feeling distressed, frustrated, sad, and tired. Sure, she’s sober and grateful for that, but some days it’s a real struggle.
Though Donna does seem to “do” a lot when it comes to self-help (reading, listening to podcasts, etc.), she’s not actively applying important concepts to her life.
“Here it is nearing 2020 and I’m sad because not much has changed this year in my life regarding New Year goals. I had some really great goals, but I haven’t really made much progress. In fact, most of my life looks exactly as it did a year ago:
- My finances are scarce, and I live more paycheck to paycheck than I’d like.
- I didn’t really try that hard to get a better job.
- I didn’t start a hobby.
- I didn’t grow my friendship circle. In fact, I isolated a lot.
- I didn’t go on those vacations I promised myself I would.
Clearly, Donna wants to see major changes in her life for the better, but for one reason or another just isn’t experiencing it.
But perhaps if she could get hold of this phrase and really embody it:
Nothing changes if nothing changes.
And, if you want big changes, you have to make big changes.
Do you see that? You can’t just want to see your life change, though the desire is a great first step. You actually have to take action toward change, step by step, week after week.
It’s like working the 12 Steps of Alcoholics or Narcotics Anonymous. As you work through the steps, you’re staying sober. You’ve committed to abstaining from alcohol or drug use. But further than that, you’ve got to “work” the steps to experience change in other areas of your life too.
Sometimes, perhaps you have to do some MAJOR modification to get unstuck, clear the hurdles, learn how to deal with setbacks, and experience positive change.
Goals For 2020
So, for 2020, what might you do different? What MAJOR things can you implement into your life to inch toward accomplishing your goals? What kinds of things can you do to ensure that next December you can share with your family and friends how AMAZING your year was because you accomplished so much toward your goals? What will it take?
Well, we know one thing: You’ve got to go at your New Year goals with a different mentality than you have. Again, nothing changes if nothing changes.
See, a lot of people have good intentions, but their actions don’t line up. They may have many goals written down, but a month, six months, or a year later they’re still sitting on those goals. be able to list five or ten goals that they are sure they are going to accomplish, but one, two, three years later those They haven’t “done” much to really make them a reality.
Here are some common ways people settle:
- Spending more money than they have.
- Figuring they’ll have to live paycheck to paycheck the rest of their lives.
- Stay in a miserable relationship for various reasons.
- Stay in a job they hate.
- Stay miserable in their negative emotions or environment.
Donna admits that always starts off with a bang and her desire for change is strong. However, she finds herself falling short and forgetting about her goals within a short time. It seems life shows up and she gets knocked off kilter, losing sight of her clear path she created for change.
Change Requires Effort
Friends, change is going to require you doing something different. You might have to jump out of your comfort zone. You may have to draw a line in the sand and so, “No more!”’ to things like fear, laziness, naysayers, etc. to accomplish those New Year goals.
Those that enjoy success in any area do so because they’ve taken the time and effort to do what they needed to do. They didn’t let fears or doubts keep them down. They kept themselves motivated and asked for help when they needed it. Most people want to experience some level of success in every area, including sobriety. If you’re not there, then know that there are changes you can make in order to do so. This could mean hiring a life coach or attending counseling. Or, it could mean sitting down and creating a detailed action plan that you look at every day, making the effort day in and day out.
What about you?
As 2019 ends, sit down and gauge your accomplishments. Give yourself kudos for goals you did achieve – sobriety included!
Take note of New Year goals not yet achieved or ones you’ve put on the shelf. Ask yourself some important questions:
- Are you happy with your progress and where you are on your journey?
- What would you like to see different?
- What does your optimal life look like?
- Are you in need of additional support to gain momentum?
The great thing about life is that each day we have the opportunity to wipe our slate clean and start again. If you’re after change, know that there’s a way to go after it. If you need help or motivation, figure out what works for you in terms of getting it. It might mean attending a class or support group. Or, maybe it means reading books or attending seminars. Bet and believe no matter what you want, someone else has already achieved it and has left you a detailed plan in how you can too.
Make 2020 the kind of year you truly deserve!
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